A condolence card (suruadressi) is a card or a folded memorial folder used to express sympathy to the deceased's loved ones — a quiet, dignified gesture of the Finnish funeral tradition. The card includes a cover and inside pages where a memorial verse or poem, words of condolence, and the names of the senders are written. The card can be handed over at the funeral, delivered to the family beforehand, or sent by mail if you are unable to attend. A standard card costs from a few euros to a few tens of euros at a store; for charity cards from many organisations, the price includes a donation to the organisation's work. This guide explains what to write in a condolence card and how to deliver it in practice.
What to write in a condolence card?
The structure of the card is well-established. On the first inside page, a memorial verse or a line of poetry is written — for example, "With warm and respectful memories", "With gratitude for everything", or a line from a poem or hymn dear to the deceased. Below this come the words of condolence to the family: a short, warm sentence is enough — "With sympathy, thinking of you". Lastly, the names of the senders are written: a family, relatives, a circle of friends, or a workplace community can all be on the same card. Handwritten text is always appropriate — authenticity is what matters most, not creative writing. If you struggle to find the right words, collections of ready-made verses and florists' templates can help you get started.
Where to buy a condolence card and how to choose one?
Condolence cards are sold by florists, book and stationery shops, funeral homes, and the online stores of many organisations. The selection includes cards with both religious and completely non-religious cover images and verses, so you can choose based on the beliefs of the deceased and their family — a nature theme or other neutral cover is always suitable when you do not know their beliefs. In addition to the cover, it is worth looking at the inside pages: some cards are blank, while others have a pre-printed verse. If you purchase a card online, allow a few days for delivery so that it arrives before the day of the funeral. A funeral home can also help you obtain and deliver the card if you are handling other arrangements through them.
How does a workplace or association write a condolence card?
When a card is given by a workplace, association, or other community, the condolence is written on behalf of the community, accompanied by the names of the signees or, for example, the phrasing "colleagues at company X". In a large community, the list of names can continue onto several inside pages. The tone of the text is kept general and warm, as condolence cards are often read aloud during the memorial service — more personal memories can be left for a separate card or letter to the family. Clear handwriting or a typed and carefully attached name sheet ensures that all names are read correctly.
When and how is a condolence card delivered?
The most common way is to bring the card to the funeral: cards are usually collected in a basket or on a table in the foyer of the church or chapel, and they are often read aloud during the memorial service — this is why clearly written names are important. If you cannot attend the service, the card can be sent by mail to the family or delivered through the funeral home before the day of the funeral. Even a late expression of sympathy is valuable — to a grieving person, every remembrance matters, even weeks after the service.
What is a charity condolence card?
Many organisations — such as health and patient support organisations — sell their own condolence cards, with proceeds going towards the organisation's work. A charity condolence card combines two gestures: sympathy for the family and a donation in memory of the deceased. If the obituary requests a remembrance to a specific organisation instead of flowers, a card or memorial donation through that organisation is the perfect way to respect this wish — the organisation will notify the family of the donation with a card.
What happens to the condolence cards after the funeral?
After being read aloud at the memorial service, the cards are gathered together and kept by the family. Reading the cards is an established part of the memorial service: the reader mentions the memorial verse and the senders' names, allowing the family to hear all those touched by the memory of the deceased. For many grieving people, the cards are an important, tangible memory of how many shared in their grief — they are often revisited even months later. Therefore, it is best to write names in full and clearly, so the family will know even later on who sent the condolences. Many families thank those who expressed their sympathy afterwards with a thank-you card or a thank-you notice published in a newspaper; however, there is no need to wait for a separate thank you, and its absence does not mean your remembrance was not precious to the family. If you are organising the service yourself, agree in advance on who will collect the cards, who will read them aloud, and who they will be handed over to at the end of the service.
Frequently asked questions
Do I need to give a condolence card if I bring flowers?
No — a card and flowers are alternative or complementary gestures. Many choose one or the other; those closest to the deceased often choose both.
How much does a condolence card cost?
A standard card costs from a few euros to around twenty euros. For charity cards, the price includes a donation to the organisation.
Who reads the condolence cards?
The cards are usually read aloud during the memorial service — often, a loved one asked to do so or a master of ceremonies handles the reading.
Can I express my sympathy without a condolence card?
Yes: a handwritten card, a letter, or a phone call and visit later on mean just as much to someone who is grieving.
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